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Random Shots - Week 10

A Twisted Look at The NFL Every Week And All That Goes With It

I'm going to risk my (already shaky) standing among the (admittedly
shady) group of people who write about pro football by doing something
you won't see any writer in America do this week:  Write a column
spending less than 75% of the article whining about or ripping Terrell
Owens. I'm going to attempt to limit myself to one thought on him.
Let's see if I can do it.

The best question asked at the Drew Rosenhaus press conference (which
was mistakenly billed as a Terrell Owens press conference) was exactly
what I bet Owens was thinking. The reporter asked Rosenhaus, "What
have you done for [Owens] other than get him kicked off the team?" The
bigger lesson for Owens was the answer Rosenhaus gave. "Next
question". The next time Mike Irvin says something stupid and a
reporter asks Owens what he thinks about it, that might be an answer
worth considering.

How dominant were the Giants Sunday? San Francisco not only never saw
the goal line, they never moved the ball past the Giants 29 yard line.

As good as Eli Manning's been, does it surprise you to know that this
Sunday was his first professional win outside the confines of Giants

I'm telling you, don't forget about the Bears.

Tiki Barber owners are starting to have their fears confirmed 
Brandon Jacobs vultured two short yardage TDs Sunday. He also was
credited with a special teams tackle on a kickoff return. That's
pretty cool.

I know Ty Law's had a ton of success at this level but LaDainian
Tomlinson made him look silly on that cut back. "I was like the fans,"
Chargers coach Marty Schottenheimer said. "I saw the cut on the
touchdown he made against Ty Law and I was anxiously awaiting the
replay of it. I wasn't sure what I saw actually happened."  When I see
Tomlinson run, I think of Shannon Sharpe trash talking with the "You
couldn't tackle me in a phone booth."

Serious question  do the programming guys at the NFL Network really
think anyone cares about Regina Smith's fantasy team?

Was San Francisco ready to play? The Giants opened with a 28 yard pass
play to tight end Jeremy Shockey. And the 49ers only had ten players
on the field.

How good are the Steelers? Charlie Batch can complete 9 of 16 passes
for 65 yards, throw no touchdowns and one interception, and still win.

I think Carolina's Steve Smith missed the memo that only 6' 2" / 210
pound receivers could excel at this level. How important is Smith to
the Panthers? He's caught 40% of the Carolina passes which is just

The back judge Don Dorkowski, injured his calf during the second half
of the Giants game. The game finished with six officials. Just because
I know you guys have to know that kind of stuff.

Mike Shanahan said he feels a little more comfortable visiting Oakland
than he used to:  "The group of people who used to throw batteries at
me is getting a little older now and they don't have the range they
used to have."

Miami's Gus Frerotte wasn't touched Sunday. He was not touched in the
pocket. No hurries. No knockdowns. No sacks. I wonder what David Carr
would pay for a day like that. On the flipside, Miami was a pathetic 0
for 9 in converting third downs. Carr knows exactly what that feels

The leading receiver for Pittsburgh Sunday? Full back Dan Kreider.
With two receptions for 13 yards. Yes, that's the same Dan Kreider
that's caught a total of 47 passes in his six year career.

I know I'm contractually obligated to call Dick Vermeil's decision to
go for the game winning touchdown from two feet away as "gutsy" and
"courageous". But let's be real. If he'd kicked the ball and gone for
the tie there against that toothless Oakland defense, it would have
been the most gutless call of the year. With that Chief defense,
you're a coin flip away from giving up a score. Just call it what it
was  the obvious move.

Detroit is the only team in the league that has failed to score this
year on an opening possession. Just because I know that's been keeping
some of you awake at night.

Speaking of the Lions, your leading rusher this week? Joey Harrington.
With 17 yards. How can a team look this good on paper in August and
this hapless in November? That's why they don't give out trophies in

The University of Nebraska was blown out by Kansas Saturday. In football.

The Patriots have now given up 40 points at home twice this season.
The last time that happened, they were playing home games at Fenway

Sad day for Footballguys and our All Name Team:  The
Packers cut wide receiver Taco Wallace today.

Arizona's Neil Rackers continues to make his case for MVP. He's now 26
of 26 and also leads the league in touchbacks.

Through the middle of the third quarter of the Oakland  Kansas City
game, all of the drives for both teams had ended in a punt, a field
goal or a turnover.

Chris Simms was pretty funny talking about Philadelphia. "I never
liked the Eagles. They were always hitting my Dad".

Carolina Panther cheerleaders Renee Thomas and Angela Keathley were
arrested at a Tampa nightclub where witnesses reported the two women
were having sex with each other in a bathroom stall. Thomas was
charged with battery for allegedly striking a bar patron. Pics here
No confirmation yet that the brunette has hired super agent Drew
Rosenhaus in hopes of landing the mascot job with the Falcons, Eagles,
Cardinals or Ravens....

Sorry can't stop there. From the bio's that were on the Panthers
website, Angela listed her favorite quote as:  "Life is not measured
by the number of breaths we take but by the moments that take our
breath away." And when asked what was the best thing about being a Top
Cat, she answered: "Friendships". I don't make this stuff up.

Chad Johnson didn't disappoint Sunday. Before the game he said, "I am
the preacher. 21 (Chris McAlister) and 22 (Samari Rolle) are the
congregation. Folks, enjoy the message."

Remember back when Cadillac Williams was good? Old Timers.

Speaking of Old Timers, Trent Dilfer made us old guys proud Sunday
running downfield looking to throw a block for wide receiver Dennis

Question for Chris Simms and Aaron Brooks, why would you ever pick #2?

Call the Hall of Fame. Mike Vick threw for 200 yards Sunday. The more
I hear him talk, the more I think Terrell Owens might be a good fit in
Atlanta. Easy now, save the emails, that was a Mike Vick comment. And
it wasn't critical. Because I was listening when Mike said we can't
criticize him anymore....

I hated to see Wayne Chrebet go out like that.

Are there uglier jerseys in all of sports than what they make the NFL
Pro Bowl guys wear?

I don't care if Brandon Lloyd drops ten passes this week, that one
handed catch Sunday earns him the great hands title in my book.

We're nearly to Thanksgiving and Arizona has the same number of
rushing touchdowns that I do.

Clinton Portis and Sean Taylor represented the University of Miami
well Sunday with goofy socks that will surely earn them a nice fine.
Portis did this several times last year if you'll remember.

You probably saw Dan Marino fire a pass to Mark Clayton after his
induction speech at the Hall of Fame this summer. Sunday, the team
honored it's Hall of Famers and Marino did the same thing throwing a
rope to his former receiver, Mark Duper.

I'm not hearing nearly as many stupid Ricky Williams jokes this week.

The Colts are not going undefeated. Don't even get started there.

Week 9 Hard Luck Awards

ATL QB Vick 19 yard pass to TE Crumpler to the 1 (Dunn TD)
NYG RB Barber 2 yard rush to the 1 (Jacobs TD)
NYG QB Manning 23 yard pass to WR Toomer to the 1 (Jacobs TD)
KC QB Green 36 yard pass to the 1 to RB Johnson (Johnson TD)
SEA RB Alexander 10 yard rush to the 4 (Hasselbeck to Jurevicius TD)
SEA QB Hasselbeck 12 yard pass to the 1 to RB Morris (Hasselbeck TD)
ARZ QB Warner 79 yard TD pass to TE Edwards nullified by penalty (Rackers FG)
CHI RB Jones 4 yard rush to the 4 (Orton to Gage TD)
NO RB Smith 14 yard rush to the 2
NO RB Smith rush for no gain from the 2
NO RB Smith 1 yard rush to the 1 (Brooks TD)
CLE PK Dawson 29 yard FG nullified by penalty
GB QB Favre 17 yard pass to the 4 to WR Driver (Gado TD)
CIN RB Perry 4 yard rush to the 1 (Rudi Johnson TD)
CIN QB Palmer 34 yard TD pass to WR Henry challenged and reversed
CIN QB Palmer 48 yard pass to Chad Johnson to the 4
CIN QB Palmer pass for no gain to RB Perry from the 4 (Palmer to Henry TD)
TB QB Simms 4 yard pass to TE Becht to the 5 (Alstott TD)
IND RB James 6 yard rush to the 3
IND RB James 2 yard rush to the 1 (Manning to Harrison TD)
IND RB James 3 yard rush to the 5 (Rhodes TD)
SD QB Brees 17 yard pass to TE Gates to the 4 (Tomlinson TD)
SD QB Brees 29 yard pass to TE Gates to the 3
SD RB Neal 2 yard rush to the 1 (Tomlinson TD)
SD RB Turner 5 yard rush to the 4
SD RB Neal 3 yard rush to the 1 (Tomlinson TD)
NYJ RB Martin 1 yard rush to the 5 (Bollinger to Sowell TD)
MIN QB Johnson 7 yard pass to WR Taylor to the 3 (Fason TD)
DET QB Harrington 40 yard pass to WR Vines to the 1 (Pinner TD)
CAR RB Davis rush for no gain from the 1
CAR RB Davis rush for minus 2 yards to the 3 (Kasay FG)
Sometimes it's better to just not know....

Thanks for playing along. I hope you have a gas with whatever you're
doing in your life. Here's to Football.

If you've got a Random Shot of your own, shoot me an email at
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